Staying Connected After a Break-Up — 10 Simple Tips
Are you dealing with the breakup of a relationship that wasn’t your decision and now hiding away? Distancing yourself from friends, family and the outside world is a common way to deal with a breakup. If this is what you are experiencing currently, then it’s likely that you're also unable to sleep or eat, let alone have a conversation with someone.
It is easy to hide away and hibernate, but when you are exhausted with the stress of a breakup, the one thing you need to do is to keep yourself in touch with the outside world. It’s time to be kind to yourself and even the smallest of connections can help to boost your mood. Just saying “hello” to your neighbour is better than no connection with anyone at all, but if you can, try and go further than that. For example, speak to friends and tell them the things that are likely to be on your mind like, “How could he/she do this to me?”
Talking with others keeps you connected and engaged and helps towards ensuring that one day you will be happy again. Don’t be afraid to talk about the pain you feel, because if you hide away from your social network, you are likely to shy away from yourself. Everyone has experienced a broken heart, so you are not on your own.
Here are some tips to make sure you keep connected when dealing with heartbreak:
- Talk to your friends, tell them how you feel. If they are not just fair-weather friends, they will be there to listen and support you
- Make yourself go to the supermarket and buy food (who knows who you might meet there!?)
- Go for walks and say “hello" to people you meet
- Answer the phone when people call you
- Take up your friend and family offers of going out. We are not saying you should become so obsessed with going out and socialising to the extent that you don’t have time to acknowledge what has happened, but a good meal with close friends can boost your morale
- Don’t eat lunch at your desk, go to the local coffee shop or somewhere where there will be people around you
- Make plans for your future - book a holiday or theatre trip
- Make eye contact with people. If someone smiles at you, smile back. Just the simple act of smiling can lead to feelings of happiness, as it changes the chemistry in your brain, making you feel better
- Connect face to face with people and on a personal level. This may mean disconnecting yourself from social media for a while. You don’t need to know that your ex is having a great time, while you are suffering!
- Do something nice for someone; it’s amazing how small things such as opening a door for a person can make you feel good inside
We know some of these things are the last things you feel like doing, but trust us, if you can stay connected with the world around you, you will be happier than just hiding under the duvet. Treat yourself with compassion and ask yourself, “What would you advise a friend in a similar situation to do?”